Arkansas Hunting banner

1 - 4 of 4 Posts

·
Moderator<br>Campfire<br>Humor & Games<br>'07 Deer
Joined
·
10,307 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
LOUISIANA STRANDED
>>
>> T-boy Boudreaux finally decides to take a vacation. He books himself on
>> a
>> Caribbean cruise and proceeds to have the time of his life until the
>> boat
>> sank.
>>
>> He found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other
>> people,
>> no
>>
>> supplies.. Noth ing. Only bananas and coconuts.
>> After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most
>>
>> gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him. In disbelief, he asks
>> her,
>>
>> 'Where you come from? How you get here?'
>>
>> 'I rowed over from the other side of the island,' she says. 'I landed
>> here
>>
>> when my cruise ship sank.'
>> 'Dat's amazing,' he says. 'You was really lucky to have a rowboat wash
>> up
>>
>> wit you.'
>>
>> 'Oh, this?' replies the woman. 'I made the rowboat out of raw material
>> found
>>
>> on the island. I whittled the oars from gum tree branches; I wove the
>> bottom
>>
>> from palm branches; and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus
>> tree.'
>>
>> 'But ... but .. dat's im possible,' stutters T-boy. 'You ain't had no
>> tools
>>
>> or hardware. How you manage dat?'
>>
>> 'Oh, no problem,' replies the woman. 'On the South side of the island,
>> there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed. I found if I
>> fired
>> it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile
>> iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware.'
>> T-boy
>> is stunned.
>>
>> 'Let's row over to my place,' she says.
>>
>> After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As
>> T-boy looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. Before him is a
>> stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white.
>> While
>>
>> the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven h emp rope, he can
>&g t; only
>>
>> stare ahead,
>> dumbstruck.
>>
>> As they walk into the house, she says casually, 'It's not much, but I
>> call
>>
>> it home. Sit down, please. Would you like to have a drink?'
>>
>> 'No, no tank you,' he says, still dazed. 'Can't take no mo of dat
>> coconut
>> juice.'
>>
>> 'It's not coconut juice,' the woman replies. 'I built a still. How about
>> a
>>
>> Pina Colada?'
>>
>> Trying to hide his continued amazement, he accepts, and they sit down on
>> her hand-woven couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories,
>> the
>> woman announces, 'I'm going to slip into something more comfortable.
>> Would
>> you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the
>> cabinet in the
>> bathroom.'
>>
>> No longer questioning anything, T-boy goes into the bathroom. There, in
>> the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a
>> hollow-ground edge are fastened on to its end inside of a swivel
>> mechanism.
>> 'WOW! dis woman is amazing,' he muses, 'what gonna be ne xt?'
>>
>> When he returns, she greets him wearing 'nothing but vines'
>> strategically
>> positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit
>> down next to her.
>>
>> 'Tell me,' she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, 'We've
>> been
>> out here for a really long time. I know you've been lonely. There's
>> something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've
>> been longing for all these months. You know...'
>>
>>
>> She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing!
>>
>>
>>
>> 'You mean ...', he swallows excitedly, 'We gonna watch the LSU game from
>> here'?
>>
 
1 - 4 of 4 Posts
Top